Sitting outside talking with family and friends and one of the guys ask my son where his girlfriend was; his response was, she’s not my girlfriend. The guy asked; well, your friend than and my son said no, she’s not my friend either, he said; I’m courting her, the guy looked at him dumbfounded and asked what’s that?
I was cracking up until I realized he was serious he said he’d never heard the word before.
That something to think about, an 18yr old young man doesn’t know what it means to court. This is fuel for the condition we find our selves in as a nation of people who have evolved right out of kindness and chivalry, into selfishness fueled by fear.
Sad as it is this young man doesn’t know what it means to court, it’s even sadder that no body’s shared this tradition with him cause it’s not mainstream. Not too many things are taboo anymore there’s no air of mystery, no hint of seduction, everything is laid out before you with little or no instructions just dive right in!
It’s no coincidence this young man doesn’t have a clue it’s not his fault he’s from a generation of children defined by dysfunction, neglect, and anything goes. The days of the knight in shining armor or the hero that saves the women’s virtue has gone the way of booty calls and jump-offs.
Seems like to me instead of perpetrating the appearance of growth, we need to give these young people something different to aspire to then the next big rapper holding down the hood.
Anyway here’s my interpretation of courting:
Spending time getting to know each other doing things we mutually enjoy together holding hands, going on dates watching movies, opening doors, pulling out chairs, asking permission before moving to the next step. This is a short list but it is sufficient to display the idea, you get what I mean.
Some of these may seem foreign to some but at one time in our history in order to sleep with someone you had the responsibility to at least get to know something about them first, not just meet, screw, and cut off.
Well, that’s my gush for now I go back into meditation,